The Return of the Pseudo-Artist

Until Instagram came along, it wasn't easy being a pseudo-artist. Guys like myself had to invest considerable time and the energy to learn the skills necessary to make a photograph look worse. These days, kids who have never heard of things like D-76 or Dektol would simply load up Instagram on their iPhone 3GS, point, tap, and VOILA! Instant pseudo-art.

As a result of this, the whole pseudo-art scene is going down the toilet in a hurry. Everybody is a bloody pseudo-artist now. Confronted with this perversion, I have, on many occasions, howled at the moon and sacrificed many chickens all in the hope of reversing this retched technological progress.

Then, my prayers are answered. Enters Ilford XP2 400. Like any color print film, this little gem may be processed by any one hour photo joint. But get this, it's a BLACK AND WHITE film! That's right! A B&W film that may be processed anywhere by anyone, with results that imitate Kodak T-MAX 400. The photo god is indeed a kind and merciful fellow.

The result, dare I say, is the most pseudo-artistic thing I've done in the past 20 years. Eat your heart out, Instagram!